Daddy, what's a 'J. Sheekey'?

I'm sorry, it's not all it's cracked up to be and is a little up its ass. I had a much better fish stew at the Thyme Cafe in Sheffield (ok, it's further to drive, but you know what I mean).

The films however, were very good (despite being unable to get our first choice). First off was 'The Witch of the West is Dead' made in Japan and starring Sachi Parker , followed by the Swedish film 'Involuntary' and rounded off by British production 'Helen'.

'The Witch of the West is Dead' reminded me a little of 'Pan's Labyrinth', if only because there is a similar sense of enchantment. 'Involuntary' reminded me of a 1970s Swedish porno flick - several stories with no connection whatsoever, with the film switching between them after a few minutes (the less said about the 'chalet' section, the better - i'll never do a handstand when butt naked and near a flagpole). 'Helen' featured excellent cinematography and the use of premium stock was genius - it brought out the colours so vividly.

The icing on the cake was a decent fresh lemonade in Canteen - although we thought we had to duck as an old boy (late for his reservation and so lost his table) went bonkers and started blaming the restaurant staff for his being late, etc, etc. At least I didn't use my persuasive skills on him - unlike on the tube train on the way into town in the morning, as I encouraged a passenger to pole dance on the Piccadilly line.

No trip with the iPod Perv is complete without some CD browsing - I came back with 13 - several by Horace Silver, some Tomasz Stanko, Nitin Sawhney and that Algerian pisshead, the fantastic Rachid Taha. The Perv even got me a box set of Ananda Shankar discs. I feel all moist now.

Unfortunately, while driving back, I had to listen to him play some George Formby (the simpering twat with the ukulele) songs that were actually banned by the BBC. Still, it made me drive that much faster.